Back home - he's always with me - #praisegod

Those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength, they will soar on wings like eagles -  who knows, but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this......

Hello my dear dear friends, 

I am still a bit dazed from all the experiences this summer brought - I can't say I have been suspended between heaven and earth this year, like I did last year - I rather have to say, I experienced both (heaven, earth as paradise, as God intended it in the beginning and even a bit of hell, what the fall changed it into) - but the good news is: nothing could scare me, or silence my voice - even if at times I had no words...... - I have felt the presence of the love of my life (#theloverofmysoul) with me every step of the way. 

In moments of persecution, his heart beat in mine and rose me up, to speak up for myself and others - in moments of loneliness and sadness, he was there, to give me his gift of solitude shared with  him, to an extend I never ever dreamt possible - we were walking together, hand in hand, sharing the most precious moments.

I got it now, he is in my heart and I am in his - nothing in this whole wide world can ever separate us......my heart overflows with gratitude.

When I start thinking along the patterns of the world, the patterns of separation and judgement, I am lost - in those moments I experience the hell of being separated from #theloverofmysoul, being separated from my beloved daddy in heaven, who is having my best interest at heart at all times, and who is preparing my home in heaven even as we speak - of that I have to be sure, otherwise other people and situations can make me falter - yet, this summer, I learnt that they cannot truly mess with my mind anymore, for God pulls me back in his way of thinking pretty much instantly......the renewing of my mind, that has occurred over the last two years has been thorough and profound. For that I will be forever grateful - for Christ has taken residency in my heart and the guidance of God's spirit has done the rest...... - I know, I am still a work in progress, but I know, that I have come a long way.....

Just the other day, after we have returned from Europe, I was for a moment back in worldly thinking mode, and I was sad and lonely - yet Christ showed me, that he is with me at all times, that I am his precious bride and that we'll live the greatest love of all........right now, it's only in the spiritual realm, but I believe in the things unseen and I am sure to receive what I hope for. When the earth was created, everything existed in the spiritual realm already - so this love will happen down here eventually.

For those of you who wonder, why I am saying this, even though I met with the man I had reconnected with and had a good thing going since March - well, all I can say is, that yes, we had an amazing thing going and we still do, but that I learnt that it's not the people - it's the relationship with #theloverofmysoul, that is paramount. The question is: who will follow Christ's lead and submit fully to his calling and let Christ move fully through him or her. So it's not about this man or another, it's about fully surrendering to Christ on my side and on his......and then it's also about the lessons, that God wants us to learn, that determine the direction of our journey, so I don't know, where we're headed, but I trust that God knows, and that he will guide our paths.

Trusting him, is all I can do - and I can tell you, that it's not easy at times, cause the more I learn about the way God sees us, I realize how little I know about my own life, and where it is headed......all I know is, that no matter, where I am headed, it has to be in his will and that to him belongs all the glory. He can use me any way he desires, to make himself known to those around me - it is no longer I that lives inside my body, it's him - but through this I found the greatest love of all: the never-ending love between #theloverofmysoul and myself - fully and forever free to be authentically me - the way that God created me in the first place.

I feel his heart in mine - on a spiritual level we converse all the time, he knows my heart and he will never ever let go of me, of that I am sure - he has shown me far too often, how deep and how wide his love for me truly is.

On this note I will let you go, and hopefully connect with you again soon - 
with blessings from my heart to yours always and forever.

Amen